Money Can’t Buy Me Love!
LOVE – I’m talking about self love here, self love is the most important kind of love that there is and the most important gift that you can give to yourself.
Without self love, we will forever be searching for someone else to love us and to fill that gaping hole inside us (which can never really be filled, until we love ourselves).
So, I hear you say why do I have to love myself and isn’t that a bit soft? No, is my resounding reply, there is nothing amiss about loving yourself however; there will be plenty amiss with your life if you don’t.
The reasons that you must love and appreciate yourself are:-
1. When we love ourselves we value ourselves
2. When we value ourselves then we want the best for ourselves
3. When we want the best for ourselves we avoid risky people and risky situations.
4. We look after our health
5. We look after our wealth
6. We set goals and have high expectations for ourselves
7. We have boundaries and we take pride in our achievements
8. As our confidence and our achievements grow, we appreciate our self more and more.
9. The cycle continues to grow and is self perpetuating.
When we don’t love ourselves then we are forced to search for love outside of ourselves. As we become more and more desperate for love, we may accept situations and relationships that do not promote our well being.
Even when we do find someone who loves and cares for us, our “neediness” frequently ends the relationship. We don’t even know that we are “needy”, all we were trying to do was to be loving and to be loved. Yet, here we are again, once more sad, lonely and abandoned. We promise ourselves that this will never happen to us again however, the next time that we see that “certain smile”, off we go again and this time we are even more determined than before to make this relationship work.
However, the relationship won’t work, how can it, we can’t live our lives through someone else.
Tragically, without even knowing it, we have learned a pattern of behaviour which will see us suck the life out of our relationship by:-
1. Not allowing our partner to breath
2. Constantly being at their side and curtailing their life
3. Demanding more and more attention and proclamations of love
4. Dropping our own friends
5. Dropping our hobbies
6. Possibly missing work or other commitments to be at their side
7. Living our lives through our partners
Sooner or later the stifled partner yearns to break free and the relationship ends. We could have saved ourselves (and our partners), from all of this pain if we had taken the time to learn to LOVE OURSELVES.
So, if you don’t know how to love yourself, then I am about to give you a crash course.
To love yourself you must:-
1. Know who you are – Write an essay about your life and READ IT.
2. Write 1-3 days in your perfect life and THINK ABOUT IT.
3. List your skills and attributes and APPRECIATE THEM.
4. Use Personality Tests like Color Quiz – 5 minute (free), Personality Test. http://www.colorquiz.com it’s free on line and ANALYSE THE RESULTS.
5. Check out Jonathan Cainer (Astrologer) website http://www.cainer.com and see what he says about your star sign and THEN APPLY YOUR COMMON SENSE.
6. Use the Myers -Briggs tests (you will find some free on line) try Myers-Briggs_Type_Indicator
7. Request and listen to feedback – if it’s true, THEN USE IT
8. Find information from many sources – you may want to try Numerology.
I’m not asking you to believe all that you learn but I am asking you to begin to build a picture of yourself and your capabilities. Keep building your self knowledge and begin appreciating all of your good points. Look out for all of your good characteristics and be grateful for them. Then begin to look out for all of the good and kind things that you do and say.
Before you know it, you will have a complete profile of who you are. You will then be able to value yourself and begin treating yourself and looking after yourself. When you truly love yourself, then your life, your career, your relationships and your future; will all thank you for it.
© Theresa Sives 2012
As ever, I would love to hear your thoughts!
Excellent post!
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Hi Theresa,
Very interesting and inspiring post. I think I have always struggled a little with loving myself, I am far too harsh on myself most of the time. I am going to read your post again as there is a lot for me to give thought to here. Thank you for sharing.
Regards,
Sue.
Hey, I just adore your content!
is it okay if I use some of the information from this blog post if I make a link back to your site?
Hi Folks
I don’t mind you quoting from my articles as long as you acknowledge me as the author and link back to my site.
Good luck with your endeavours!
Best, Theresa
Hi Sue
Nice to hear from you again!
I popped over to your fantastic site, I was looking for you’re About Me page, but I couldn’t find it. I did find a kind of bio on your interests and hobbies BUT NO PICTURE?
If I were your coach, then I would be asking you to put an About Me page, near the top of your blog. I would expect to read about your likes and dislikes there and a picture of you would be MANDATORY.
Your name and your picture go together and tell the world (and yourself), that you are proud of who you are. I also find that people do their best work, when their name and their picture are on it.
Best, Theresa
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