Love – It’s a Kind Of Madness!
What is it about “love” that when it’s clearly going wrong, makes us think that the way to make it better, is to “love” even more”. Come to think about it, isn’t there an old quote that says “that the only cure for love is to love even more”. Well (in my opinion), it’s all rubbish and I wish that the young, the sad, the lonely and the unfulfilled, would stop listening to it.
Every week in life I find myself sitting with people who don’t know who they are, don’t know what they want from life and have no direction. They don’t believe that the world has anything much to offer them, except perhaps (if they are lucky), a job. The really sad thing is that they appear to be living their lives backwards. They have the relationships, the children, the council house and the debt. They have been robbed of enthusiasm, promise ambition and even hope for anything better.
Where once society insisted that you have a job and are able to provide, before you embarked on having a family. Now you just take it as it comes. The result of this is plain to see in the tired, downtrodden faces of the young people who are living this lie.
How can it be, with the money that we plough into education each year that our young people are still leaving school with no sense of self worth and no idea of who they are? Let me say right now that I don’t blame teachers for this, giving our children self belief is without doubt, the domain of the parents.
However, with so many single parent families and the long hours that adults work, there has to be a case for making confidence building throughout the school years, a priority. After all, what a child achieves and what he fails to achieve, is all down to the level of self confidence that he feels; and his expectations of achievement or failure. So, this is a call to look at the school curriculum with fresh eyes and from the point of view of building self confident children, who know who they are, and what they are capable off.
My ideal curriculum would have as its major priorities:
- Reading
- Writing
- Confidence Building
- Enterprise
- Debt Management
- Relationships
When we have no self confidence, when we don’t know who we are, then we are easy prey to “falling in love”. We project all of our unmet needs onto this person who has shown an interest in us. We believe that there strength will carry us through. Of course the truth of the matter is, that we don’t attract what we want, we attract who we are.
The end result is often said to be “two starving individuals, trying to take each others food“. Children then enter this chaotic mix and everyone is dependent on the state to provide. This saps self worth even further and we now have a new generation of children, who have come into the world, with little or no hope for the future. Individual happiness often centres on how someone else feels that day, be it their partner or their parents.
I don’t need to tell you that this is a recipe for disaster. How long will we allow it to continue and how many more young lives will be wasted, before we accept that our life is all about confidence and relationships. The quality of our lives reflects our self confidence; we can only have boundaries in our relationships when we know who we are. Until then, we will fall in and out of unsuitable relationships, sometimes with disastrous results. We will blame it all on MEN or WOMEN and we will go on believing that love, well it’s a kind of madness!
© Theresa Sives 2010
Hi Theresa,
What an excellent, commonsense article – you should be in politics! The ordinary citizen can see all that is wrong in society, why can’t the politicians?
Probably because they are too busy with their snouts in the trough.
Regards,
Bill
Hi Bill
Thank you for your comment it is good of you to keep taking the time to comment on my posts. Your thoughts are always welcome and it’s always nice to hear from you.
Best, Theresa
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